so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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