and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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