Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
