glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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