I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
