she kept yelling 'call me bella'
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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