you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
