so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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