4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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