no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
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