afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Randomize
