party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
