I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I've blown a few things in my day
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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