do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
North Korea, Best Korea!
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize
