For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize