It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
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