I am in a vortex of obligation.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Randomize
