How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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