Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize
