Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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