At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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