Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize