Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Someone signed my nipple.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
