You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
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