similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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