i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
he puts the penis in happiness.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.