i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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