I am spending my child support on dildos
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
