woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
