my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
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She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
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I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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