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• (248): View more from Michigan

  What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I think you know the answer.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  How can I marinade myself in Vodka?

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• (352): View more from Florida

  You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence

  (415): View more from California

  shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.

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• (516): View more from New York

  When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos

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• (818): View more from California

  I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom

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• (562): View more from California

  When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  My left boob kept making random appearances last night.

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• (806): View more from Texas

  Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.

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• (820): View more from

  Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Me and I got head

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.

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