i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Randomize
