So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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