this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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