Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
