She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
