I bet he comes in French.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
