is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
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Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
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Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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