god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize