; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I'm drive I can fine osifer
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
