SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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