If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
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