I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
