im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
