I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
