wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
