the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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