went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
