You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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