dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Found your dick twin last night
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
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