at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
